How personal values can help you to navigate a busy life
Life can be overwhelming. It can also be incredibly fulfilling. Most of us are walking the line between the two. Personal values are a great anchor point to keep you calm in the chaos and spend more time on the side of fulfilment. These are the principles that are most important to you. For example, fun, freedom and family are some of my values (not necessarily in that order!). When I’m making decisions in my business or personal life, I make sure my decision aligns with fun, freedom and family.
Why? Being led by your values enables you to build a meaningful life because you are prioritising what matters to you and what you find fulfilling. When we make decisions that aren’t aligned with our values, it creates inner conflict. It feels uncomfortable. We struggle to put our hearts into it. For example, if sustainability is a personal value of yours and you were to work at an oil company, you’d find it hard to put your all into helping the business grow because you don’t believe in it. Usually, personal values show up in more subtle ways. That doesn’t make them any less impactful on your personal happiness.
Why personal values matter
We are more familiar with hearing about values on an organisational level. Groups have values that unite them. Businesses have values that drive them. Values are also within us on an individual basis and knowing what they are allows us to take ownership of our lives. Here’s how.
Understand yourself better
What motivates your actions, shapes your thoughts, and defines your beliefs? You might be thinking I do what I do ‘just because’ but there is a method to your madness influenced by your experiences and the values they have instilled in you. The qualities you hold in high regard directly impact what you do and how you feel. By exploring your values, you understand how you tick, which is essential information if there’s a change you’d like to make in your life or an ambition you’d like to achieve.
Pursue your purpose
As humans, we want to have a purpose. It’s important to us that there is meaning to our existence. Not everyone finds the same things meaningful or purposeful. It depends on what they consider important. So if you know your values, you can find a meaningful way to live your life that feels right to you. (Sod anyone else’s opinions or expectations!)
Feel more motivated and energised
Not claiming responsibility for your life means following paths you think you should or what seems convenient for others, rather than making choices aligned with your own aspirations and values. Why shrink yourself to fit into other people’s expectations? It’s disheartening and uninspiring. By following your values you live life your way which is incredibly motivating and energising. Generally, you’re willing to push yourself if it means fulfilling your potential and your purpose.
Clarity!
There are an infinite number of ways to live your life. How do you decide which one is right for you? Explore which pathway aligns best with your values. That will be the path of least resistance and conflict and the best possible experience and outcomes. If you struggle to make decisions according to your own needs, working on your values makes this much easier because you have criteria to consult in every decision you make.
How To Identify Your Personal Values
So where do you find these magical personal values that will make knowing yourself and taking ownership of your life easier? Through self-exploration that raises your awareness of what really matters to you and the principles you want to live by. Try out some of these exercises:
Review the highs and lows
Reflect on your life, particularly the high and low moments. What made the highs so high and the lows so low? For example, look back on your career and identify your favourite and least favourite job. What about the job did you love or hate? The pros and the cons will link back to your values. For example, if you didn’t like that you were micromanaged at a job, freedom and autonomy are probably important to you. If you loved a job because you helped people, social responsibility is likely important to you.
What do you want to be known for?
If someone else were to describe you in 3 words, what would you like those words to be? Essentially, how do you want to be perceived? The things that are important to us jump to the top of the list. For some people, they want to build a reputation of being wealthy and influential. For other people, their kindness and playfulness are what they want to be remembered for.
What do you admire in others?
Often what we admire in others is what we’d like to replicate in our own lives so it’s a great indicator of our values. Think about the people that inspire you. What is it about them that you find so inspiring? It could be their courage to be authentically themselves. It could be their warm and welcoming personality. It could be their integrity. Don’t overthink it. Explore whatever comes up for you.
Envision your ideal life
One of the biggest challenges in understanding and embracing what you really want is getting passed the ‘shoulds’, other people’s expectations and your limiting beliefs. One way to steer clear of all that is to think hypothetically. It’s not real so it doesn’t raise the “But how…” thoughts as much. Envision your ideal life without restriction. Money, past experiences, your current skills and any other hurdles don’t matter. In an ideal world, what would your life look like? What values does that reflect?
Journal for self-discovery
Your values probably won’t instantly come to mind. Doing the inner work is rarely instantaneous but it is worthwhile because it pays off in major progress in personal growth. Take your time to journal on your values over multiple journaling sessions. Use the exercises above as inspiration. You can get some specific prompts through my 30 Days of Journaling Self Discovery for Self-Love email series.
Guidelines for your life!
Knowing your personal values is like knowing your cheat code to happiness and fulfilment. Instead of relying on guesswork and trial and error, you can make informed decisions about how you live your life and find purpose in the everyday. Exploring your personal values is just one area of self-discovery and one tool for taking ownership of your life. There’s so much more to find out about yourself so you can be the person you want to be and live the life you want to live.
We cover it all inside the Journal Vibe Club, my membership for people who are ready to meet the best version of themselves. Each month, we explore a theme related to self-development through daily journal prompts, a guided workshop and community discussions. In June, the topic is Values and Boundaries (funnily enough).
Using journaling as a self-coaching tool, receiving support from a like-minded community and having coaches to ask the right questions at the right time, Journal Vibe Club members embrace who they are, warts and all, and forge their own path to achieve their definition of success. Sign up for the Journal Vibe Club to feel more in tune with who you are, what you want and how to get there.
